Avoiding mean Associations
Sitrinam Anjum Perumai Sirumaidhaan / Sutramaach Choozhndhu Vitum
Classical English couplet — “The great of soul will mean association fear;The mean of soul regard mean men as kinsmen dear”
What it says in plain words
“People of good character avoid groups that encourage harmful behavior. Those who accept such behavior welcome these groups as friends.”
The classical Tamil reading
பெரியோரின் இயல்பு சிற்றினத்தை அஞ்சி ஒதுக்கும், சிறியோரின் இயல்பு அதையே சுற்றமாக எண்ணித் தழுவிக் கொள்ளும்.
An expanded Tamil interpretation
பெரியோர், கீழ்மக்களின் கூட்டத்தோடு சேர மாட்டார்கள் ஆனால் சிறியோர்களோ இனம் இனத்தோடு சேருமென்பதுபோல் அந்தக் கீழ் மக்கள் கூட்டத்துடன் சேர்ந்து கொள்வார்கள்
The ethical and philosophical heart
The couplet contrasts avoiding harmful company with welcoming it into your life. Your choice of close friends shows what behavior you accept. For example, joining people who regularly cheat means accepting dishonesty around you. Keeping your distance shows that you take good conduct seriously.
In personal life, work and society
- Personal
- You avoid a group that enjoys making fun of others.
- Workplace
- You decline to join coworkers who cheat customers for extra money.
- Family
- You teach your child to choose friends who treat others kindly.
- Society
- You avoid joining a local group that threatens its neighbors.
How to apply this today
- Decision-making
- Consider how people treat others before joining their group.
- Integrity
- Refuse to join dishonest acts just to keep your friends.
- Communication
- Tell friends calmly that you will not join in cruel jokes.
- Leadership
- Bring together people who treat others fairly, rather than those who encourage harm.
- Governance
- Choose public advisers who reject dishonesty rather than welcome it.
For leaders and teams
Show those you lead how to choose good company. Avoid joining groups that make dishonesty or cruelty seem acceptable.
Something to sit with
“What does your closest circle show about the behavior you accept?”